mothering a newborn

love their fresh belly buttons.
and the way newborn size clothes hang off their tiny bodies.
 and their smell. oh, that sweet smell.

I've noticed this time around that mothering a newborn makes me feel very animal-like.
I'm constantly... nuzzling my nose into his neck to soak up his scent.
rubbing my cheek on the top of his peach-fuzz head. marking my territory.
kissing his cheeks, eyes, nose, chin. I'm practically licking him.
pacing around him when I put him down, and checking for breathing.
twirling my fingers around his tiny ears and toes. memorizing every wrinkle.
holding his warm body close, skin to skin.
sticking the tip of my finger in his palm to trigger a tiny hand squeeze.

I just can't get enough of him.

And this time around is so different. With Ewan, I wanted him to grow big, fast. I was just so excited to discover each new stage of babyhood. With Graham... he can stay 10 days old forever. And we could just stare at each other quietly, in the warm sun, every day.